What Can't We Face
by Queequg471
Summary: What can't we face if we're together, what's in this place that we can't weather.. Giles realizes some things, post Empty Places


**A/N: So, this little oneshot has been floating around in my head forever, ever since I watched Empty Places. I love the Buffy/Giles relationship, but I always wondered why Giles still didn't put any trust in Buffy, even after everything they've gone through. **

**Disclaimer: Not Joss Whedon. Don't own anything**

With a weary sigh, Rupert Giles flopped into the old chair by the kitchen table. It was dark, but he was fairly sure there wouldn't be any unholy demons, at least not tonight.

Weary was his usual state of being these day, so it seemed. The First was an unimaginable, insurmountable enemy, and Giles still wasn't sure how they would beat it. More than likely, they were just bringing all the potentials into a death trap. The Master, the mayor, Glory, they were just products of something much greater.

They had beaten back anything and everything that had threatened to destroy them, against all odds. They were fighting an uphill battle, and the Slayer had to be at the frontlines. Only now, all the slayers in the world may not be able to win it for them. If Giles was honest with himself, he would have to admit that this was a battle not likely to be won. All of their previous battles had been fought with Buffy at the centre.

And now Buffy was gone.

Gone by their own choice.

Giles felt a twinge of guilt as he remembered the look on his Slayer's face. So much hurt.

But it had been _right_, hadn't it? Faith was just as strong as Buffy, and while her past was sketchy, no doubt, Giles could see the potential to be a great leader in her.

The door from the basement opened suddenly, startling Giles.

"You're nervous. I scared you," said a voice flatly.

Giles breathed a heavy sigh.

"Yes, you startled me, Anya, as it often happens when you burst in when I'm trying to be alone with my thoughts."

Anya shrugged, coming over to lean on the counter. "You've been thinking too much. About not fun things. We have enough of those around here, so you shouldn't be wasting your time. I've been thinking about having sex with Xander again. There's a new position I saw in my demon days…"

"Stop!" Giles cut her off. "Please, just don't ever tell me."

Anya looked stung.

"You feel guilty," she said bluntly. "That's why you're being rude."

"I do not feel _guilty_, Anya. We are fighting a great evil and I must make the decisions that are best for all of us. Buffy included."

"Oh, sure. But it's not like any of us were actually surprised when you agreed to help kick her out."

Giles's brow crinkled in confusion at Anya's offhanded statement.

"Whatever do you mean, you weren't surprised?"

"Oh you know," said Anya, looking at Giles like he absolutely should know, but he continued to look mystified.

"You know…you don't trust her. You never have."

"Ridiculous!" said Giles incredulously.

"Never give her the benefit of the doubt. Guess she just thought, after all you've gone through together, you'd trust her a little more before giving up on her completely. Especially in the middle of the apocalypse to end all apocalypses."

Anya shrugged and went to the freezer. She pulled out a pint of ice cream and a spoon and sat down to eat, seemingly unaware of the effect her words had on Giles.

_Was she right? _Giles thought. Had he and everyone else been wrong in giving up on Buffy so fast? Her hurt face flashed in his mind again, and the knot that had formed in his stomach wound a little tighter.

"Buffy knows this is for everyone's own good," Giles said, unsure of his own words.

Anya scoffed. "Yeah, she looked really sure. Probably best though. Even if we're all going to end up dead anyway, might as well last as long as we can." 

Giles felt two sides waging an argument in his mind. One side, the rational watcher side, was arguing that while it may have caused Buffy some fleeting hurt to be cast out, it was ultimately what was best. But the other side, the newer side, the side that felt such a strong protectiveness for Buffy, a feeling that made him feel like her father at many and most times, was arguing louder. Giles could hear them inside his head, louder and louder.

_It's what's best for the cause. _

_Oh, sod the cause. _

_Buffy will understand in time._

_How do you know? She might never speak to you again. _

_She must understand a change needed to take effect immediately. _

_You just cast her out._

_She's still a Slayer…_

_She could have gotten hurt, when you cast her out. What if a Turok-Han got to her?_

_I had to do what was best._

_You have no bloody idea what's best!_

"I damn well do! I think I know what's best for my daughter!"

The words were out before Giles could stop them, and he felt his face color in embarrassment.

Anya's head snapped up on hearing Giles. She stared at Giles, agape.

"She's your _daughter? _You had sex with her mother? Xander told me you had sex when you were on some kind of weird candy, but -|

"I…I...I simply meant in the metaphorical sense." Giles stumbled. _Why _had that come out?

Anya gave a low whistle. "You're like…the world's worst dad."

Giles sighed and put his hand to his head. What was once so clear was becoming a mess of enormous size. Once the thought of how he had indeed, in essence abandoned the girl he considered his daughter had entered his mind, it would not leave.

He was no better than Hank Summers. The only difference was he had not only told her to her face, but had rallied against her with the people that were the only family she had left. He could only fathom how alone she must feel right now.

Before he knew it, he was grabbing his coat and bursting out the door.

"Are you stupid or something? Big bad out at night!" Anya shouted after him, but Giles barely heard her.

**BUFFY BUFFY BUFFY BUFFY**

Giles was honestly not sure what lead him to the old, long abandoned house on Prescott Lane, but that was where he found himself. The floorboards creaked as he lead himself to the bedroom, but not loud enough to mask the gently sobbing coming from the figure in the bed.

Giles gave a gentle knock on the door, but Buffy didn't even look up.

"What do you want?" Her voice had a hard edge to it.

"Buffy…"

"I think you all made yourselves pretty clear, Giles. You don't need me anymore, Faith's a better leader, you can handle this latest apocalypse just fine without my help."

"We will always need your help, Buffy…"

"I guess it makes sense," Buffy continued. "Can't be part of your little club, seeing as how I haven't killed anyone yet. I'm sure you and Faith and Willow and Andrew can deal with this by yourselves."

"Buffy, please…"

The edge in Buffy's voice hadn't changed as she turned even further away from Giles.

"Just say what you came to say and go, Giles."

Giles edged carefully closer to the bed. He sat gently, laying his hand on Buffy's shoulder. She tensed under his touch, but didn't pull away.

"I just…wanted to say that…we all still care for you greatly, and we will most likely always need your assistance."

A scoff. "Wanna translate that from British to english for me?"

Giles sighed. "What I mean is that we…I…I just wanted to say that…" Giles fell silent for a moment, then pushed slowly off the bed and went to stand in the door.

"I wanted to say that we...I love you, Buffy. I'll always be here. And the door is _always _open."

There was a long pause, then Buffy whispered "Thanks. Now go."

Emotion weighing his steps, Giles walked slowly home.

The issue wasn't solved. Not even close, Giles knew. But it was a start.

**A/N#2: Enjoy and review, please!!**


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